Sep 22, 2015

When you find yourself capable of being the light...

Back when I created this blog I was a 22 year old wise ass with such a pessimistic attitude.
I didn't trust anyone and my outlook on society was negative.
I was very the story goes...but I was also extremely naive.
To say that I have it figured out now is also naive and cliche so I won't say it. 

Something happened once my family relocated overseas. I found myself thinking with a different state of mind. Maybe it was the move away from the familiar and routine. I allowed myself to grow and understand what was really the cause of my view of the world; me. 
Plain and simple. 
Along with an attitude change came a change in lifestyle. 
I was just shy of 200lbs. At five foot two that is not a desirable weight. In fact, it was a devastation to my health and my mind. 
I was miserable because I had allowed my body to become a waste basket. 
Years of increasingly bad habits had taken over.
I had to fix it. 

First, my attitude had to go. No negative Nancy's were allowed. If I wanted to keep a change, I needed to walk the walk. 
Every day I found a positive outlet. Most of the time it came in the form of a Pinterest quote. Hey, you do what you gotta do. 
From there I would make time to exercise. *Insert Legally Blond endorphin quote here.*
Heavily processed foods and "fast food" were soon discarded (I haven't touched fast food in two years). Fresh veggies and homemade foods ran the home. 
Finally, I took a good look at who I was changing for; me. 
My children and husband needed the best version of me. I needed it more. You see, if you don't find that version of you, you can't bestow it upon anyone else. 
Soon enough, they had who I was meant to be.

Within a year I had lost 50lbs and gained a world of sunshine. Oh yes, I am a walking talking cliche. 

I know there are stressors and horrible happenings in the world. At 28 years old I can agree that it is there. I also know that isn't all there is. The pessimistic version of me had to understand that with a whole lot of self love. 

The point I'm trying to get across is that my journey to be the light in the darkness I once held onto was because I needed to make that change. 
In order to be the light one must find it within themselves. Keep the things that weigh you down physically and mentally away from your body. Especially negativity. Small changes...

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